


If you want to hold me, tell me

by emidegrey



Series: Eyes Locked, Hands Locked [2]
Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-25
Updated: 2020-01-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:07:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22403860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emidegrey/pseuds/emidegrey
Summary: "Do you like him?”His stylist suddenly asks and he looked up with a huge smile on his face, nodding excitedly. "I'm a fan, noona! They're actually why I decided to try and become an idol myself."Sequel to Could you begin our strange love
Relationships: Lee Hoseok | Wonho/Son Hyunwoo | Shownu
Series: Eyes Locked, Hands Locked [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1606108
Comments: 8
Kudos: 59





	If you want to hold me, tell me

Hoseok took several deep breaths to steady himself before coming up on stage when he was announced as the winner of the Rookie Actor Award. The loud cheers from the crowd fill his heart with what he could only describe as gratefulness as he walks up the stage to receive the trophy.

He licked his lips just before speaking into the mic, slightly fumbling with his greetings as he swept his eyes across the crowd, his heart beating wildly in his chest at the thought of hundreds of thousands of eyes focused on him. 

“Ah, hello, everyone, my bunnies, this is Wonho.” He starts gripping the award a little tighter as he stood properly by the mic stand, his eyes slightly stinging. “I’d like to thank everyone who has been with me since the beginning. My fans, my family, Hongsik-hyung, and the staff. This award is a result of your hard work as well. Please watch over me for a long time and watch me grow. Thank you!” 

He gave a deep bow, holding the award close to his chest as he tried to reign in the tears pricking the side of his eyes. He gives a small wave as he was assisted down the stage, his eyes moving towards one of the senior idol groups which seem to be missing a member. He slightly felt disappointed at the thought that he wasn’t able to see one of the people he looked up to, but tried to brush the feeling off, still in disbelief over the award he just received. Before he went down entirely he saw several fans sitting together and waving at him - a huge smile grew on his face and he waved back, using his arms to make a heart before getting back to his seat.

Although it wasn't awkward sitting with other soloists, most of them were his seniors and he was intimidated to make small talk with them. His eyes kept shifting towards the side where senior idols sat, and he noticed when Shownu from Monsta X returned to his seat, seemingly telling something important to the group. He thought it would’ve been nice if he were able to speak with the senior idol. After all, he was the reason he decided to enter the industry in the first place.

With a sigh, he could only lean back in his seat and look forward to the performances ahead. 

It was a long night.

* * *

Hoseok can feel his face heat up as he noticed which group was walking towards him on his way back from his stage rehearsal for Inkigayo. 

His heart was beating wildly in his chest as he got closer and closer to Monsta X, and suddenly he feels like turning back and hiding in one of the bathrooms until the coast was clear.

He felt intimidated, but only because they looked so good. 

The group wore purple tailored suits today, the neckline was low and their necks were accessorized with chains and leather collars.

Hoseok feels light-headed.

This was Monsta X he was seeing up close. His ultimate group. His inspiration. 

He greeted the members quietly, bowing as he passed each one of them. Just as he reached the end, he accidentally made eye contact with Hyunwoo and he couldn't help muttering a shy, "Shownu-sunbaenim." 

He feels like he was short-circuiting when the other directed a smile towards him after he greeted Hoseok back. Hyunwoo? Actually smiling at him? What the fuck?

They passed each other without a hitch and he hears Minhyuk call out to Hyunwoo, but he didn't dare look back, his face already too warm to his liking and his heart still frantic in his rib cage. 

He needs to get to his dressing room fast.

* * *

"God, hyung, he looked so good I nearly died when he gave me a small smile! I don't even know if he heard me when I greeted him... He must've, right? I mean he smiled at me!" 

Hoseok rants as he lays on the couch, the Inkigayo sandwich he was eating almost forgotten as he rolls over to his stomach to look at Hongsik who was on his phone, probably fixing his schedule again.

“I'm sure he did, Hoseok-ah. Don’t move too much and sit properly, you’ll ruin your clothes. Focus on eating.” 

Hoseok pouts at getting a lackluster response, but Hongsik had been stressed since the morning. He does as he was told and sits up properly, munching on his sandwich and ignoring the initial weird texture he chewed on deciding he accidentally ate a part of the wrapper. 

He took a few more bites before stopping as he remembered how good Hyunwoo looked in his outfit. How the color complimented his skin and the swept-back hair showing such a manly image… 

Hoseok wants to cry. 

Maybe he should’ve done more to try and strike up a conversation. But it was unlikely he'd be able to have a proper one because of the schedule; Monsta X will be doing their comeback stage today, while he will be doing his goodbye one. The odds weren't in his favor at all. 

He keeps munching away, still a little lost in his thoughts when he suddenly felt like he swallowed something he shouldn’t have. Looking down at his sandwich he noticed something sticking out at the side of the wrapper.

Picking it out he realized it was a piece of paper with a series of numbers written on it. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion before he realized it was someone’s phone number. 

An incomplete one...

...because he accidentally ate a piece of it.

He blanched for a bit before he rushed to Hongsik to show the paper to him, “Hyung, look! Someone left me their number!” 

Hongsik took the slightly damp piece of paper, eyes squinting a bit before shaking his head. “You shouldn’t keep this, Hoseok-ah. If they really want to be your friend they would approach you themselves.” He says and pats Hoseok's head when he sees the other start pouting. He crumples the paper and throws it away to Hoseok’s dismay. 

Hoseok heard of the stories of how idols interested in other idols would give each other their numbers through the Inkigayo sandwich. It wasn’t like he was looking for a relationship, but it’d be great if he was able to start making friends with those in the industry. Hoseok resigned to finishing his sandwich, but when Hongsik left him alone for a bit he secretly took the crumpled piece of paper and kept it anyway. 

* * *

“Oh, that’s Shownu from Monsta X, right?”

Hoseok’s eyes quickly shift to the mirror to see his stylist watching the episode of Lipstick Prince on his phone. A smile spread across his lips as he leaned back to look at her. 

“You know about them, noona?” He never really got to talk to anyone about Hyunwoo or Monsta X aside from Hyungsik and his family. He’s still way too shy to make friends with people in the industry so he barely has anyone to actually call a friend. 

The older woman nodded as she continued her work on Hoseok's hair, pushing it back and styling it. "I used to work with Sistar's makeup team when they were short on staff. I used to see him a lot as a trainee, but I left just before he debuted. He's a sweet guy based on what I saw."

Hoseok hummed thinking back on the pre-debut videos he watched of Hyunwoo from when he was still a backup dancer and some of the dance videos they uploaded on their channel. He thought Hyunwoo was already performing well at such a young age. 

"Do you like him?”

His stylist suddenly asks and he looked up with a huge smile on his face, nodding excitedly. "I'm a fan, noona! They're actually why I decided to try and become an idol myself." 

He giddily told her how he accidentally discovered No Mercy and even went to the events to watch the trainees perform. How he decided to become a trainee soon after that while continuously being a fan until he got to debut himself. He also admitted how he got too busy he can't really keep up with Monsta X as much which saddens him.

He pouts as he looks at his phone screen still stuck to a scene of Hyunwoo helping out a co-star during a mission. He wonders how fun it would be to be a guest on a variety show with Monsta X.

He sighs. Maybe next time, they're both too busy anyway.

* * *

Hoseok feels like he's going to die. 

It wasn't his first interview and not his first radio show, but this was the first time he would be working and speaking with Hyunwoo. He's so scared he'd fuck it up he feels like he'd vomit. 

He kept stealing glances towards Hyunwoo who was walking just in front of him as they were led from their dressing rooms to the studio.   
He was so close to just turning back and maybe hiding in his dressing room to die. 

As he stood to the side with his hands together he noticed Hyunwoo looking at him. His body immediately froze as he looked away. God, can the earth open up and swallow him whole? His idol and crush is an arm's length away from him, and he’s making a fool out of himself. 

"Are you okay, Hoseok-ssi?" Hyunwoo asked sounding so concerned. Hoseok felt his heart skip a beat.

It took a while, but Hoseok eventually nods and looks up at Hyunwoo once he gathered some more courage. "Yes, just a little nervous, sunbae." 

Hyunwoo hums and gave him a small smile. "You'll do fine. I worked with him before and he's fun. I'll be there too, so just relax and have fun."

Hoseok nods again, giving him a soft smile before taking some deep breaths to try and calm his nerves down. The words were reassuring and thinking the other would look out for him somehow gave him the courage to just do his best. He was thankful Hyunwoo was being a kind senior to him. 

* * *

"Hoseok-ah, are you okay?" Hongsik asks as they entered the van on their way to the next schedule.

Hoseok looks at him through the rearview mirror, making a small noise of confusion, "Hm?"

"You're spacing out."

Ah. 

Yes. 

He actually got Hyunwoo's number. It felt like a dream but it wasn't, and he had it saved and he was allowed to call him hyung instead of sunbae and and and--

"Oh." 

He started rummaging through his bag for his wallet and brought out the half gnawed piece of paper which he kept since that last Inkigayo incident. 

He checked both the number on his phone screen and the paper he had in hand and felt like he was going to cry.

The numbers matched perfectly except for the part Hoseok accidentally ate. Was Hyunwoo trying to befriend him even before? But if that were the case then he could've just asked for Hoseok's number himself. He would've given it enthusiastically. 

* * *

Being Hyunwoo’s friend was easy.

Dating Hyunwoo felt natural.

Hoseok didn’t expect for things to develop the way they did, but what started off as friendship turned into something more when Minhyuk admitted it was him who slipped Hyunwoo’s number in his sandwich almost a year ago and how devastated he was when Hoseok never texted Hyunwoo who he firmly believed had a crush on him. 

Minhyuk wasn’t wrong with his assumptions.

When he fumbled about admitting his feelings of admiration to Hyunwoo, he didn't expect for Hyunwoo to confess he liked him the way Hoseok liked him. It took Hyunwoo a good half an hour to calm Hoseok down when he started crying because everything felt too good to be true. 

Hoseok was especially thankful for how accepting Hyunwoo's members were of their relationship after discovering they were dating when he and Hyunwoo were caught close to making out on their dorm sofa. 

They were scolded by Kihyun for being too reckless, but other than that there were only well wishes, especially Minhyuk who firmly believes he played matchmaker to the both of them.

Hoseok could only agree with him.

Getting Hongsik to approve of their relationship was trickier. He liked Hyunwoo as a person, but Hoseok was his charge, and despite Hyunwoo's good reputation, Hoseok was still considered a rookie in the industry. Dating each other, especially since they're both guys, it wasn't something the public would accept easily. Nevertheless, he relented, but not without making the couple promise to always be careful. It was also one of the few times Hoseok received a very tight hug from Hongsik aside from when he debuted and receive one of his first awards. He cried while hugging his manager back.

They didn’t do anything risky outside like hold hands or kiss whenever they go on dates which made it easier to pass their relationship off as just a very good senior-junior relationship. Their good relationship wasn't something they hide, and they would speak about it when asked during variety shows.

Somehow it felt exhilarating.

Sometimes it’s suffocating. 

They know what their country and society think over a relationship such as theirs. Not to mention they’re also considered as public figures and could be criticized and ridiculed beyond belief. 

Times like those they’d hold each other tight for comfort and reassurance. 

And it was enough. 

* * *

Hoseok was in his dressing room after recording his comeback stage for Music Bank. He was left alone for a bit as Hongsik and his stylists prepared for the fan sign later that day as well as to get him some food. His muscles were stinging from how much he danced easier - the air conditioner helping to cool him down. 

His comeback single could be described as 'strong' this time with the dance powerful with lots of large movements leaving him breathless most of the time. Even his wardrobe this time was a little more… daring. Although he didn’t shy away from sexy concepts, most of his songs were considered to be soft or cute, and it has been a while since he wore something with skin showing. He initially wanted to keep the silver hair with blue tips he had during the music video but his stylist dyed his hair pink when the color washed off. He honestly likes it...

It’s just…

He wasn't sure if it fit the concept they thought of.

He was wearing a lace bodysuit with a leather jacket and pants… and he has pink hair. Although they had it styled with his hair swept back, it’s still a bit… he guesses his fans would still find him cute no matter. 

He was brought out of his thoughts when someone knocked on his door. Before he could even invite the person in, Hyunwoo already let himself inside and had leaned on the door, smiling at him through the mirror Hoseok was facing. 

“Hi.”

Hoseok grins and makes his way to Hyunwoo, hands outstretched for a hug which his boyfriend indulged him with. Hyunwoo’s hand hot against his lace-covered back while his arms wrapped around the taller male’s shoulders. 

Hoseok was grinning when he pulled back a bit, just enough to look Hyunwoo in the face, excited that his boyfriend sneaked to visit him before Monsta X leaves to pre-record.

"Did you get to watch my performance?" He asked giddily.

Hyunwoo nodded and pressed a kiss to his forehead. "You did well, Hoseok-ah."

Hoseok giggled at the kiss but shivered as Hyunwoo’s hands moved to his exposed hips, idly playing with the lace digging in his skin. His cheeks colored as he watched Hyunwoo's eyes darken slightly.

"You're seriously so sexy," Hyunwoo whispers slightly leaning in before catching himself and pulling back, face just as red as Hoseok's. His hands leaving Hoseok's sides as if to give space.

"Sorry." He muttered, suddenly self-conscious of where to place his hands.

It wasn't the first time they were intimate but Hoseok likes how considerate Hyunwoo is with him. He grins despite how red his face was and takes Hyunwoo's hands in his, interlocking them, and leans up to give him a peck on the lips.

"That's kinda the point." He giggles and holds Hyunwoo's hands a little tighter. "I'll wear them again next time. It was my idea anyway."

Hyunwoo looked flustered and Hoseok laughs. 

"You should get going, they'll start looking for you." He says as he starts pulling away, but Hyunwoo was the one to hold him back this time, fingers tensing a bit more. 

"Good luck kiss," Hyunwoo asks with a pout and Hoseok gives a hearty laugh at how cute Hyunwoo was being. 

He leaned in to give him another kiss, hands interlocked and pressed to their chests.

Hyunwoo feels like home.

**Author's Note:**

> Ah! So it's done~ This really was a fun project. There really wasn't supposed to be a sequel but I really wanted to write about Hoseok accidentally eating the phone number and it wasn't possible with Nunu's POV. So there it is! I hope you guys enjoyed this as much as I did! Anyway, if you wanna chat or just scream at me find me on twitter [@emidegrey](https://twitter.com/emidegrey) or on [cc](https://t.co/qykJAWH54k)! You can also check my art account [here](https://twitter.com/emidegrey_art/status/1150965148250595329?s=20).


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